Art Fight Blues

I joined Art Fight in 2024. It was a wonderful time! I made more pieces than I expected and received a lot of wonderful things in return. I was on the losing team (Seafoam), but I had an absolute blast anyway.

In 2025, things were the opposite. I was busy, stressed, and exhausted before the event even began. I got one attack done. To make matters worse, I got a bunch of defenses. I promised these people I would attack their characters next year. A terrible decision, really.

This year, things aren't going well. I've made one attack I'm really proud of, but nothing else. That attack was a revenge for a defense I received this year. I have two other defenses to revenge as well!

This wouldn't be so bad if it weren't for the backlog from last year. Honestly, I just want to forget about them and move on. I can't, though. I gave them my word and it would be shitty of me to not follow through. The solution to this is so obvious. I know I'm just being selfish, but Christ, I really just want to leave 2025 in the past.

I was so disappointed in myself for not meeting the quota I set. Ironically, this quota was vague. It was just to keep making things until I exhausted all my resources. Kind of impossible when I didn't have resources to begin with!

I'm sitting here on a chair as I type. I know I can just go and set up my drawing tablet. All the while, I'm making excuses to not just get started. My brain is split into a guilty conscience and an exhausted but lazy couch potato. It sucks!

I've also gotten into a bad habit of bookmarking instead of drawing. I want to draw these characters—truly! I'm just not! It's stupid!

I hope that by talking about this publicly, I'll force myself to draw. Sure, this feels embarrassing, but wouldn't it be worse if I said all this and then didn't change? Don't shame me, though. I must do this myself. It'd also just still be kinda rude, haha.

Maybe this is a terrible way of looking at things. Probably! Doesn't matter to me. I need to get on top of this shit.