a day in my life
as i, jeremy renner lookalike, woke up handsomely in my lushious bed made of silk and unicorn hair, i looked around. and then i, the one and only jeremy renner lookalike, made keto eggs and whole wheat toast for myself. but when i ate and went outside for my 5 am run in central park (yes new york thats where i live) models and parkgoers wouldnt stop asking for my number! even if i'm a LADIESMAN217, i still politely declined. for i am kind enough to spare the population from my gorgeousness. it truly is a burden. after my run ended, i went back to my Penthouse and greeted my teacup puppy with prosthetic biceps and abs (the accident was terrible), named Elon. Elon spoke with me telepathically about the gains we could make for the day. what he said specifically was "đąī¸âšī¸âī¸âī¸đ§ī¸âī¸ âī¸â ī¸đī¸ đŖī¸âĄī¸ đ§ī¸đī¸âī¸âī¸âī¸âŧī¸âī¸â ī¸âī¸đĒī¸ âī¸âī¸âŧī¸ đŖī¸âĄī¸ âī¸âī¸đŖī¸âī¸ âī¸â ī¸ âī¸âī¸âī¸đ§ī¸ âŧī¸âī¸âšī¸âī¸âī¸âĄī¸ âī¸âī¸đ§ī¸ âšī¸âī¸đ§ī¸âī¸âī¸đī¸ âī¸ đŖī¸âī¸âšī¸âšī¸âī¸â ī¸âī¸âī¸đŦī¸ đŖī¸âĄī¸ đ§ī¸âī¸đī¸âšī¸ âī¸đ§ī¸ đī¸đī¸âŧī¸âŧī¸âī¸â ī¸âī¸âšī¸âĄī¸ âŧī¸âī¸âī¸âī¸âī¸â ī¸âī¸ âī¸â ī¸ âī¸âī¸âī¸ âī¸âī¸đ§ī¸đ§ī¸âī¸âšī¸ âī¸ đī¸âī¸â ī¸đ§ī¸âī¸đī¸âī¸ âī¸â ī¸đŦī¸ đī¸âī¸âšī¸âšī¸ đŖī¸âī¸ âī¸âī¸âī¸âī¸âī¸âŧī¸đŦī¸ âĄī¸âī¸đī¸âŧī¸ đąī¸âŧī¸âī¸đ§ī¸âī¸â ī¸đī¸âī¸ âī¸đ§ī¸ âī¸đī¸âī¸âī¸âī¸âī¸âšī¸âĄī¸ âī¸âī¸âŧī¸âī¸đī¸âŧī¸âī¸â ī¸âī¸ đŖī¸âī¸đŦī¸", which i'm pretty sure meant 'we should buy some crypto'. at around lunch time, i made around 1b turkish lira, so i was pretty hungy from the work. I went to the bagel shop beside my penthouse and bought a wagyu butter-soaked elephant tusk ivory shavings bagel. by the time my yoga class with my good friend jeremy renner lookalike lookalike, who looks NOTHING like me, i was ready to hang out with my bro. after some intense pilates we shook our bro hands epic bro-style like the bros we are and went our seperate bro ways. of COURSE, though, more beautiful women asked for my info on the way home. and you know what i did already! i politely declined. because I like men. and specifically, jeremy renner.
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