Trigger Warnining, Do not read if you are sensetive to Self Deletion/ Skip to last paragraph for a VERY IMPORTANT MESSAGE


I was going through some of my old voice memos when i found one i'd made into a song. And everytime, I get chills hearing this one specific line, because at the time, I was just free styling and letting things off my chest. (I do that through free styling songs or writng down lyrics, short stories and stuff.). I always thought it was just a silly thing I did, but now looking back a year later, I realize that it was the mental state I was in. A lot of the stuff i wrote back then are darker than i realized at the time. Even now, if I'm not careful, I'll slip into that spiral again. I recently clawed my way out, idk how but i did. anyway. here is the thing line in the song that makes me go Yikes. Warning signs were there.

"I wanna end it all tonight.
So I'll go up a roof tonight.
Don't care what people will think.
Cause when I'm gone I wont think think at all."


Again, now that i am not THAT deep into the spiral. It makes me wanna slap some sense into myself. even though i know that's not how it works. I know, That when you are in that spiral, everything seems worse. literally the only thing that can save you, is you. all that to say that, if anyone needs to talk, about just anything, even if it is to yap about your favourite show currently, or how much you despise ketchup, or how you feel like you dont wanna bother your friends, I'm here. Im here to show you that you arent alone. That there is light at the end of the tunnel. And that youre stronger than whatever you struggling through.

And please know, that if you were my friend irl, I would rather you feel like youre being a burdern, than me having to attend your funeral. That shit hurts. And it still hurts today. i dont think I'll ever heal from that. so just know: your friends would rather you bother them, than not ever bother them again.